The Official Top 40 - Opens In New Window
In order to ensure I don't become trapped within the years I grew up, each week I shall listen to the top 40 in full, express my thoughts and have a fit.

Week commencing 10.08.08

The Saturdays - If This Is Love**
The Saturdays are a newly designed and pieced together girl-band. A marketing man's wet-dream literally made flesh. I hate to say it though, if you're not going to make songs as good as Girls Aloud and you're a girl-band, why bother? The beats go for the r&b dancefloors, one of the girls voices is vocodered and generally the vocals are pretty weak. Absolutely no Girls Aloud or Spice Girls. The song itself though is the kind that's utterly harmless and with a top, sexy video - these girls could be on their way.

Noah & The Whale - 5 Years Time**
Do you like songs with whistling in? Sure, we all do! Except me. So, the intro has a little pointless whistle for an introduction. The first verse worries me because the lead singer sounds particularly flat. When the female voice joins in with 'sun, sun, sun' - things pick up, but not enough. I'm expecting this to get more developed sound-wise, the first couple of minutes consist of vocals and ukelele. Ah, drums and bass join then stop again. Another verse! Ah, the chorus better be good, because i'm starting to get a little bored. Oh, that 'fun, fun, fun' bit IS the chorus. Ah well, never mind.

Ne-Yo - Closer**
More R'n'B club-dance nonsense. The hook is decent enough but this over-produced slice of modern soul lacks distinction. The vocals aren't even particularly soulful - this one is more for the dancefloor than listening to at home, I have to have.

Kid Rock - All Summer Long ***
I've never liked Kid Rock and he's rarely had the same commercial presence in the UK and his homeland, the US. 'All Summer Long' is 'Sweet Home Alabama' with different lyrics though, as far as I can tell. An easy-listening, soft-rock sound and it's therefore no surprise this has charted high in the UK. We haven't had a summer, but Kid Rock wants to soundtrack it anyway. Proves that TV-Advertising of music still works. Nifty guitar solo too in the middle, by the way.

Week commencing 27.04.08

Gabriella Cilmi - Sweet About Me ****
I've not heard this at all before now, even though it has managed an eight week chart run and counting. The sound is very retro soul, aka Adele, Winehouse and Duffy. The voice is in a similar vein too, although possibly slightly more accomplished from a professional point of view. Very catchy is this and I may well investigate Grabriella Cilmi as a result. Hey, i've only just started and i've got a result!

Sam Sparro - Black And Gold **
This is where the worry comes in. 'Black And Gold' sounds exactly like the kind of thing Cream and Ministry Of Sound compilations have featured for at least ten years. Has dance music really not changed at all during a decade? Because this type of music is the type of music 'the kids' are growing up with, this is their natural place and their natural style of music, how music 'should' be. Climbing from number three to this weeks number two, Sam Sparro's 'Black And Gold' has spent seven weeks on the charts. The vocal is cool, deep and soulful, the music is dance by rote although not as irritating as this stuff usually is.

Basshunter - Now You're Gone *
When the thumping bass enters the fray following the vocodered lyrics, of course you'll be worried. Well, this song has been around for absolutely ages, some five months in the charts at the time of writing. It's got elements of trance dating the track back a good ten years in style. There's nothing new here and it's very easy to see why this is a tune big on the dancefloors. In terms of Basshunter, don't expect him to be making any kind of artistic statements, these types of things are purely for the moment, although I do appreciate they attract the same kind of nostalgia for those that like this stuff, in ten years time, as the likes of 'Karma Chameleon' by Culture Club does for me. It's a kind of fascinated, morbid curiosity. 'Now You're Gone' already sounds old though, because no-one has advanced dance music. Talk about going round in ever decreasing circles, talk about going round in ever decreasing circles, talk about going round in ever decreasing circles, talk about going round in ever decreasing circles, etc.